dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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