Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
birth control should be required to get into college
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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