come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Holy sore nipples Batman
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
