no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
