I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
