I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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