The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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