He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize