Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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