Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I want a musical about memes.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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