Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
