bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
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