SEEEEXXX PLEASE
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
