we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
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