you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I am mentally ready for anal.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
