Who wears a wallet chain?!
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
I FOUND THE LEGS
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Randomize
