That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
please don't ironically join a cult
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
