just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
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