Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize