My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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