I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
You did what with his pubic hair?
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
