would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
