Too much gin, very little bucket
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Randomize
