You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
