But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize