I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Be still, my beating vagina.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
