just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Randomize
