It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
