bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
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