we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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