for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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