Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
