Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
