Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
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