I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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