Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
