Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
