somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Randomize
