It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize