how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
