We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize