I wanna bring you to show and tell
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
25 Men Confess The Moment They Knew They Wanted To Marry Their Wife
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
You Wouldn’t Guess That These 25 Celebrities Are Complete A**holes
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
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