She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
