Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
