used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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