she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
