It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize