Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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