ya dads aren't the best wingmen
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
