and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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